Let’s start off by saying this, as her boyfriend, you should be one of her closest friends — if not the closest — but at the same time that doesn’t mean you should be her only male friend. Men typically feel threatened when they’re dating a woman with a slew of men friends, but there might not be anything to worry about at all. How many is too many guy friends anyway? Five? It’s hard to quantify what constitutes an exaggerated amount of male friends, since it’s relative to her circle of friends; to give you a guide, I believe that if more than 60% of her friends are male, that can be considered a lot of friendly testosterone.
If that’s the case, then you need to know what you’re getting yourself into and not act surprised when she mentions all her guy friends. Who is this so-called “friend”? You’ve established that your new honey has many guys calling her to simply “hang out”; it’s up to you to figure out why she has more males surrounding her than a stripper’s in a photo shoot.
Do any of the following possibilities ring a bell?
- she was a tomboy growing up;
- her female friends turned on her;
- she’s more interested in sports than hair and makeup;
- she was raised in a family consisting of more boys than girls.
Although the majority of the world’s population is female, women still find good reason to befriend males, and it goes beyond having different genitalia.
She can go to him for advice
When a woman is having relationship troubles and she wants a male perspective, it’s eye-opening to speak to a man who can offer first-hand advice about her problem. A female friend can be there for her and listen to her weep, but chances are she doesn’t have the male point of view that only a male friend can offer.
So when a guy she went on a few dates with doesn’t call her after she finally sleeps with him, a male friend can tell her to move on if he doesn’t call after night number 5, while a female will go on a rant about how all men are jerks, or worse; advise her to call him.
While women can have a great time shopping all day, going for manicures together, and gossiping over a mocha cap, they also enjoy shooting pool with the boys, or even hanging out at a friend’s bachelor pad to have a gangster movie marathon.
Take immediate action
If you’re about to get serious with Jane, think about what you’re getting into, so that when Jack, Joe and Jeff come a knockin’, you’re not sweatin’. Know that you’re going to be sharing her with other guys from the start, or else you’re bound to be unhappy later on.
Don’t ever expect her to stop being friends with these men because you ask her to in the midst of your relationship — that could be grounds for a break up.
If you want to nip it in the bud at the beginning of your relationship, ask her about her male friends: how they became friends, whether they’re in her group of friends or not, or how long they’ve been friends.
Get them on your side, and make sure her guy friend isn’t going for her…
Here’s a few things that she’ll understandable:
- You’ve always been envied by most girls.
- You often feel like a man because that is how you get treated by your friends.
- Everybody believes that you hangout with the boys because you’re either dating or in love with one them. But you couldn’t care less about what they think.
- You are used to the foul language. Yet a round of verbal jabs are just a normal way of conveying affection or anger or probably every emotion!
- You always have access to great advice on what a guy you’re dealing with is thinking. So you know why he hasn’t called today!